


Wolf at the door

by prettybird



Category: DCU - Comicverse
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-26
Updated: 2011-02-26
Packaged: 2017-10-15 23:26:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/165966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettybird/pseuds/prettybird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Damian has nightmares sometimes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wolf at the door

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic in a long time, and also the first time I try to write in English. I apologize for any mistakes or characterization.

   
Damian has nightmares sometimes.

He dreams about his house on fire. He dreams about piles of dead bodies across Gotham and the streets that run red with blood. He dreams of torture and in these dreams he can hear all of them scream, Batgirl, Alfred and  
even Drake, and they hurt his hears. He dreams about Grayson, still on the Batman uniform, eyes missing their shine, no longer smiling, no longer hopeful, the warmth of his hands replaced by unbearable cold.

In those dreams, he knows who did it all.

It was the one person he could never escape.

It was him.  
 

Grayson always asks him what is wrong, how he can help, and Damian looks at the older man, wishing that he could talk, explain that it felt like he had to remember every day that he can't hurt people, to struggle not to be what he was raised to be, and sometimes it was all too much; but he never says anything, because the others can not know how he truly is.

So Damian just replies with something rude, pretending he doesn't care, and fights twice as hard to hide it all, because he can not handle the thought that Grayson might not want him to be Robin anymore.  
 

He thinks that Todd knows.

It is a terrible feeling that creeps on Damian's stomach,a mist of guilt and shame,every time they fight.

No matter what happens,he can always tell that behind those tedious speeches and dramatic gestures, behind that silly helmet of his, Todd is staring right at him, seeing his very soul and smiling. Like he knew it was all a matter of time.

One day, Damian, one day you screw up like they all expect you to, and they will turn their backs on you.

We are the same.

He wonders if Todd has nightmares as well.  
   
   
He misses his mother,and the way she used to show undying love and attention to him, the way she loved him just for what he was, and it was effortless to be him, but Damian is not sure anymore if that Talia exists or if he just created her from broken pieces of memories, and whenever he dreams about her, it is always a confusing blur of things he can no longer tell if they ever happend.

 

Stephanie (he can't bring himself to call her names when he was this tired) sometimes looks ill, like she has had her share of nightmares. It makes him think if she tosses and turns in her bed, trying to flee whatever was that haunted her, but somehow he can't picture her, a girl who once said her job was about hope, being afraid of anything.

Tonight,however,she is in her usual annoying self.

They sit on a rooftop after fighting the latest monster Gotham produced, and he can't think of anything to say to her, not even something mean or childish. All he can think about right now is how he just wants to fall asleep without waking up to be disgusted by his own reflection.

“Did you know it's been almost a year since you became Robin?” She asks,and he part of him hates that he can see her smile even without looking at her. “Seems like eternity. I can't wait for you to grow up and become Rainbow Robin or whatever.”

She says it in kind voice though, and Damian doesn't know what to do with that. He sometimes wishes she hated him, because he is not sure if he knows how to be loved.

“Still. It has some fun parts.” She adds and puts her arm around his shoulder.

He rests his head against her, because he is so sick of feeling so empty all the time, and today, just today he wished for warmth and friendship.

She is surprised but doesn't say anything. She doesn't judge him or make him feel bad for displaying weakness, like he would do if the roles were reversed. Instead, she sings softly something that sounds like a lullaby.

For the first time in a long time, Damian Wayne feels like being himself is easy.

He closes his eyes and starts to dream of her voice.  
 


End file.
